Why do girls fall for bad guys?

[: )]

Why is it that many girls fall for the worst kinds of guys? The guys that sleep around a lot, beat them, drink heavily, always fight, and disrespect women in general. Why? Are many girls masochistic? Is it (at least partly) due to their experiences with their fathers? Does crime, violence and disrespect turn certain girls on?

 

[Silly Turtle]

I think there's a certain amount of excitement that comes with a "bad boy"...a rebellion against the parents and the chase...bad boys aren't usually easy to get to settle down with one girl so to catch one is a real ego boost. That said, often girls wish they had thrown the bad boys back after they grow up a bit and realize what they could have had with a nice guy...respect, good husband, good father for their kids, someone who doesn't cheat, gamble, over drink...whatever they ended up with.

And yes, there is something sexy about a rebel. It's unfortunate but true.

 

[basketball addict]

Nobody fukks like a bad boy!!!:666:

 

[Hey you]

Why do good boys always ask this stupid question?

(and by no means do I condone your what you description of a bad boy is, violence, etc is unacceptable)

But I find a guy with a bit of confidence, who doesn't cut his own nut off to impress a lady will appear to be a 'bad boy' and it is attractive to women.

 

[H.O.P.P.E.R.]

To me a girl falling for a bad guy she immature and simply but not smart. They want to stand out and show off. Low self esteem and no thoughts of the future. Most of those guys end up losers really.Some women as men don't grow up and need reach a point in their lives where they question what is best, a guy who drunks, fights, does drugs, whatever to one who works, respects you and tries his best to make a great life with you.

Some women come from a bad homes, rich, middle class or poor with fathers who disrespect their moms and they figure that how it should be. Ok so you know I come from a father who thought he had everything and his wife was also property, he drank and was abusive. In growing up I thought I do not want that kind of marriage ever, so I did my wild thing and then by 24 it was time to grow up and get my life on tract to how I would like it.

 

[Hawaiian_Kine]

this question has been asked and answered numerous times, and yeah, violence, crime, abuse, disrespect etc turn them on.....and yeah, it's exciting. I mean, how boring would it be if you absolutely KNEW your husband worshipped you and would never in a million years cheat on you?

Plus you have to add in the fact that women love a project. You know, they think the bad boy will change and they are just the woman to do it. Same as infidelity: just because they got him while he was still with someone else doesn't mean he'll do the same to THEM, oh no.....never never never never nev...what? what do you mean you're leaving me for someone you met at the tim hortons?.........

Just so you know? Most bad boys are really just insecure little babies inside and have more issues than time magazine......

Oh yeah, and fights are SO exciting.....just ask Bliss up there? She's mentioned on many occasions how she and her husband fight and then have great make up sex. Me? I'd rather NOT fight and have great sex TYVM. But again, how boring is that?

 

[asiank]

How about a nice guy with a "bad-boy" streak?

You know the type... a gentleman in public, but behind closed doors... watch out! :whip:

:shock: :bad:

 

[Psychodelic Chicken]

Funny how 'bad boys' never ask this question....

 

[Carlos Guitierres]

They like to be tortured I guess.

 

[katejones007]

I think it really depends on the situation, for example I know of a couple who were perfect for each other, had a great relationship and were the best of friends. Been married for a long time, started a business, had kids and things were still great.

Then for whatever reason he strayed one night (but apparently didn't go all the way) and she found out about it. Things between them have not been the same since, they is alot of regret and remorse for what he did, and alot of mistrust and resentment on her side, and she swears she'll never forgive him for hurting her so badly.

After a little while he changed as a person and started verbally abusing her, but only when she brought up that night, then a few arguments got heated and he beat her.

She is going through the motions of a married couple for the kids and the business sake, but she still stays with him..........I guess in this situation it's hard for her because there is so much at stake, and she is scared (but a VERY strong and stable woman).

She once told me that she is still in love with the man she married, not the man he has become and hopes to find him again one day:neutral:

 

[elaine1]

I sure hope you set this guy straight Ang... regardless of the situation and the events leading up to it, its simply NOT acceptable that he beat her... :grrrrrr:

 

[starlet51490]

It is true that a lot of women seem to prefer straightforwardly aggressive guys to passive-aggressive self-proclaimed "nice guys." Not sure why that should seem strange.

 

[Sovelin]

That pretty much sums it up right there.

She will never let it go and is going to grind him till the end of time.

He instead of realizing this and getting out has turned to violence.

This isn't going to end well I'm afraid, they both need to separate themselves from each other.

 

[Chuckles]

I believe she is not letting it go because he has not told her the truth right from the start and she caught him in lie after lie, so obviously she thinks more went on that night.

And that's the problem he doesn't want out, he loves her to no end, it's her that has fallen out of love with the person he has become, and she wants out, but like I said there is so much at stake.

 

[K G]

So you think that if he would have told her everything from the get go that she would have just let it go? For 99% of the people i have known once the trust is gone it never comes back and without it there's no foundation for a relationship.

, In my life I have hit many people but never ever anybody that I was in love with or presently in love with, too me that is a complete contradiction. You will have to explain that too me because I don't understand it.

 

[WilliamAspeplyHili]

I'm not condoning it in the least but I've been involved with a couple of women who frustrated me to the point where with a little bit of incentive, I would have struck out. Kind of like if you poke even a tame dog long enough sooner or later he'll bite......

I don't know the specifics of Ang's friend, but from the sounds of it, he possibly wasn't such a super nice guy when she met him and he went back to his roots. Most of the so called bad boys I have known were the same all through their relationships, lying cheating etc just never getting caught. The thing is, they're fast on their feet and since they have the gift of gab, can BS their way out of just about anything (frankly because they aren't honest with themselves so how can they be honest with anyone else?).

SOunds to me like this time, the bad boy can't talk his way out of the situation and it's bugging him. I bet any amount that if she DID forgive him, and things got back to normal, he'd be out playing around in no time....that's the way they roll......



It seems strange because every woman I have ever met who has gone for the bad boys, bitch and moan to the nice guys about said bad boy. One night in particular I was out with a bad boy friend of mine and a group of people (with his live in gf too). He was off being his flirtatious bad boy self and she was fuming.....waaa waaa waaa why is he doing that waaa waaa waaaa why is he like that...I finally had enough and said "you stupid bitch, he was like that with every woman before you, he was like that when you met him, he is like that now, WHY are you surprised? Did you REALLY think you'd change him"????

That's the rub: they DO think they'll change them....stupid stupid STUPID.....

(btw, the thing is, the bad boys can appear to be "great guys" but really, they're not....and women are just too blind to see that.....though some? some see right through the BS and the bad boys just move on....for eg: the guy in my example above? A neighbour of mine met him and he tried to pull his schtick with her, only thing is, she was a smart successful independant model and saw right through him....even went so far as to say to me: don't trust him, he's 100% full of shit......it took me 4 yrs to find out but she was right, 99% of everything he said to me in 10 yrs was 100% bullshit......for eg: he told me he caught his wife cheating on him and he walked away from his house, kids, cars, everything. Thing is, his wife caught HIM cheating and kicked his ass out.......)

 

[.Vibrant1.]

Oh this is true for me!!! Sentry is such a gentleman in public: opens doors, holds my hand, pulls out my chair, always walks closest to the road, does all the "man chores" around the house without question. BUT behind closed doors he treats me like his ragdoll of love and I love it!!!

 

[Pompal 09.]

My point seems to have sailed over your head, even as you provide a beautiful example of it. Most self-styled "nice guys" actually hold women in contempt, thinking of them as "stupid bitches" (and apparently occasionally calling them that; thanks for the nice illustration). So there's really no reason a woman would prefer one of those "nice guys" to one of the bad boys; they get an asshole either way.

 

[Kreerk]

I agree with Tboy. I know few girls personally went for "Bad boys" and started crying after a month about their BFs. WTF!! they want bad boys and sametime they complain about how their BFs are not sensitive blah blah blah..

 

[Sarah Stone]

See, the point YOU missed is that women ARE stupid bitches for complaining about exactly what they went for. Just like guys are assholes for hitting women. I didn't say ALL women, just the idiots that act like idiots.

Sorry, I'm all for equality among the sexes, obviously you don't. You still think women should be treated differently but I don't. It is well known here that I call a shovel a shovel and a spade a spade. I don't mince words, life is too short to dilly dally around. The "stupid bitch" in question had NO problem calling him a "fucking asshole" so tit for tat, you can't have it one way and not the other.

I get called a mysoginist all the time but I don't hate women, I've had equality pounded into me, women are equal to men, men are equal to women, they get paid the same as us, they want to be firemen, police, combat troops, everything equal so I treat them as equals......